If you don’t have a sense of humor look away, click and exit now!
Disclaimer: These statements do not pertain to Asians of every ethnicity, nor all Koreans. I promise I’m not full of myself. But I really do love being Asian.
1. Our hair
In the debilitating Southern humidity, it actually works in my favor to take showers at night. The next day I simply wake up and go. Most days, I don’t even brush my hair. Laziness may be a factor, but I choose to look at the glass half full and thank my long, strong Asian locks.
2. Ninja bloodlines
As a female, it doesn’t hurt that people assume I am a secret ninja, know karate or practice tae kwon do. I’ve always wanted to get throwing stars because of this very preconceived notion. Ninjas are fast, elusive and it’s an easy Halloween costume to throw together in seconds.
3. Lucy Liu lookalikes
The number of instances I have been compared to Lucy Liu (or Kristi Yamaguchi or that girl in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon) is countless, despite the fact that I look nothing like any of these lovely ladies. However, if you want to make that mistake, fine by me.
4. Inherent chopstick skills
Given a set of wood or metal chopsticks, I could pick up stuff like nobody’s business. Yes, even rice.
5. Smarts, duh
We get all the good stereotypes. Who doesn’t do calculus for fun, do physics equations on the fly, or can’t figure out how to work any electronic device under three minutes flat?
6. One big happy family
You know how when you first meet someone, you try to make connections by discussing where you’re from and then see if you know any of the same people?
Well, it never fails that if two Asian people are in the same place, they must know each other and are probably related! Not only do we all look the same, we must share the same family tree. Oh believe you me, it’s happened.
7. Multilingual
Being born ethnic Korean adopted by Caucasian parents, I know precisely five Korean phrases. So, when we are eating out or at the grocery store and Asians start speaking to me in their native language, I’m a huge disappointment when I respond with my Midwest, slightly Southern, tainted English. Nevertheless I can say hello in Mandarin, Korean, Japanese, Sanskrit, Spanish, Italian, French, German and Pig Latin.
8. Being vertically challenged
Speaking for myself, I’ve always enjoyed having petite genes despite having never reached above 5’2″ on a measuring tape. Men love to come to the aid of a woman and are happy to help retrieve items off high shelves. Exceptions that come to mind are Yao Ming (7’6″) and Michelle Wie (6’1″) to name a few.
9. Good genes
As I am quickly approaching the big 3-0, I appreciate each and every single time someone mistakes me for a teenager. Last week an acquaintance asked if I was old enough to drink. Our genes are like the fountain of youth.
10. Wax on, wax off
We’ve bestowed the world with Pat Morita in the Karate Kid, Hello Kitty, mochi, Hondas, Dance Dance Revolution and fortune cookies, need I say more?
Can’t get enough? Oh don’t you worry, there’s plenty more where that came from. Check out my Lists Page.